Unfocused

I have been thinking all week how I should tackle today in blogging world.  Several ideas, but didn't want to appear to be trivial either, even though this little blog is pretty trivial in general.  Our week rushed by with lots of things going on.  So I decided I will tackle today with an unfocused approach and mention everything.

1. The end of an era and I mourn it.
Fully I celebrate Great Grandpa Ed's life. I do.  How could one not?  He was 3 weeks shy of his 100th birthday. He lived a full life, that deserves to be celebrated.  He was married to his sweetheart for over 65 years. I haven't been able to get an exact year due to everyone busy with funeral activities. He farmed. He was a WW II vet. They had 7 beautiful children and 19 grandchildren, and amazingly 18 of the 19 were able to make it to the funeral.  I am not sure how many great grandchildren he had, but I know 3 cute ones live with us.

Oct. 10, 2009

This is what I mourn, we live 3 days away from all the grandparents and until Wednesday night, our kids were unique in not only having 2 sets of grandparents that love them dearly, but also 4 sets of great grandparents.  They had 6 grandmas and 6 grandpas loving them. Each still with the one they chose so many years ago.  Eight of them lived in the same little town in Iowa.  So the fact that our kids have generations of grandparents and yet because we live so far away, I mourn that they haven't gotten the chance to truly forge close relationships with each one.  They know them, the kids love their grandparents, but as an adult, I know how amazing it was for them to have so many great grandparents, and my heart aches that they only see them in quick visits.  Oh I recognize how full of blessings all of our lives are and they are still incredibly lucky with the role models they have in grandparents. I just wish we could be closer than three days away.

2. Ten years.
For so many, this day ten years ago is as fresh as if it had happened yesterday.  Many are reflecting on what they were doing when they heard. (I was at the dog park and another dog owner asked if I had seen or heard about it, I had not, but promptly gathered up Panther and went home to find out more). Shortly after the attacks is when Eric decided to join the military. So in many many ways our lives were drastically altered. In the 9.5 years he has been in the military, he has barely been home, training and protecting our freedoms we hold so dear.  He has been to 2 basic trainings, 2 different survival schools,  2 technical schools, instructor school, AC upgrade school, 8 over seas war deployments plus others, and at least 20 TDY's  which have lasted from a few days to several weeks or months.  Prior to joining, he was a preschool teacher for 3 yr olds. We had bought our first house a mere 3 months earlier.

I miss him. We miss him. However, we are accepting of his choice to remain in the service and protect our country. We'll never get rich doing so. He'll miss more holidays, birthdays, piano recitals, and more, he has volunteered to do so, so that others may sleep at night.

3. Moving forward
The truth is, even though we live where we live due to Eric's career and he joined because of September 11th, 2001, we have not actually talked to the kids much at all about that day.  It is hard. The images are graphic. The words to describe it all are strong hateful words. We are doing our best to raise loving, caring, generous, accepting children. And this day does not represent those things.  The years of war do not convey a message love and acceptance of others. So how do we balance it?

Something amazing happened today. God knew 10 agonizing years ago, that today would be Sunday. God knew that we would still be struggling as a nation, as a world. God knew we would need a different message for today if there was a chance we could move forward.  In our church we have a 3 year rotating lectionary series. This year is year A. This year Easter was as late as it could be. This year, the tenth anniversary of a horrible day in history, the scripture reading was already in place. It has been in place for decades...dare I say generations?  God's message today:

forgive.

Forgive. Not once, not twice, but seventy seven times.

Matt. 18:21-35  NIV -I did the bold facing.

    21.Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"
    22. Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy seven times.
   23. "Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with this servants. 24. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. 25. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.
   26. "The servant fell on his knees before him. 'Be patient with me,' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' 27. The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.
  28. "But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denari. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'pay back what you owe me!' he demanded.
    29. "His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'be patient with me, and I will pay you back.'
   30."But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.
   32. "Then the master called the servant in. 'you wicked servant,' he said, 'I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33. shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' 34. In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.
   35."This his how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart."

And so, I ask you, is it time to heal our hearts? Can we now forgive? Can we, as the song says "And they'll know we are Christians by our LOVE"? Can we start to love our neighbors. Can we love those who are different from ourselves? Can we forgive and let go of our paralyzing fear that his griped us? Can we reach our hands out to others. Can we find common ground? Can we work together? Can we forgive each other, from our hearts?

4. I wish each of you a very blessed week.  Find the good in each and every day. You'll probably find God's thumbprint there too.